So...um...have you ever hired an escort?

[bensonhurstbiguy]

Okay so lately I've had escorts on the brain. To be honest, I've always said that sort of thing is definitely not for me. Hell I hate spending money, especially money that can go to my Blu-Ray or comic book collection. Plus I was sure it was illegal, which means it is a definite no-no to me. Sex isn't worth losing freedom over.

BUT after reading about The Hookies 2010 (awards for male escorts) and being in a chat room where some spam showed up advertising an escorts site with a decent price ($159 for two hours), well my curiosity has risen. A lot.

Honestly, it has been close to four years since I last did anything physical with another man. I'm 26 and totally have the okay from my 5-year-long-so-far girlfriend to mess with guys on the side. But I don't have lots of time to look for guys, or lots of time for the actual hook-ups. I'm kind of tired of going on web sites and chat rooms only to find guys that aren't my type at all, or guys who would rather talk about how "bisexual" makes no sense to them, or my relationship agreement with my girlfriend isn't right. It is four years of trying to hook up with guys (all be it with a bit of limited time) and failing.

Frankly if I can actually find a guy who is my type and available when I am, well I'm willing to pay to spend time with such a guy.

The thing is, I've never done anything like this before. I was wondering if anybody here has, if there's any advice you can offer? Heck, is it legal? I think there's some technicality in the language that makes it legal, since you're just paying for a set-up for a date and whatever goes on isn't what's being paid for or something. Also I have some concerns of going with a site that I found via chat room span (granted, it was a chat room on a very trustworthy site). I'd post the name/link of the escort site here but I don't know if there are rules against such a thing (I hope there aren't rules about even asking this question...if there are I fully apologize, and please just delete this, I'm just very confused and feel like I needed to ask this somewhere and so far I've really felt trusting about this place and the people here). Like I said if it is something that I should NOT be doing or looking into, then I definitely won't. I'm just not sure if it is or what...

[TwylaTwobits]

Honest answer to the question, No. I do feel for you though, and a quick search on google found this on a site "Prostitution
Prostitution is illegal in New York, for both sellers and buyers. It is not only illegal but dangerous with the problem of AIDS. Some drug addicts support their "drug habits" through prostitution. Police regularly "sweep" the streets of prostitutes and their customers. This can be embarrassing but is not a major criminal offense.
Escort services and massage parlors are legal. However, they can be covers for prostitution." So be wary indeed, I think there is specific verbiage and the escort service can give you more info on how to evade than anyone else but a lawyer

Good luck with your search

[mariersa]

Whoops I thought he was refering to Call Girls, yikes beware $78.50 an hour that includes tax of course

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

lol Be my damn luck it would be an undercover Cop...lol
I personally wouldnt do it, but thats just my humble opinion, Darlin. Good luck no matter which way ya go.
Cat

[void()]

Cat,

Don't worry 'bout getting a vice hooker. I'll slut myself out for you, honey. :biggrin:

Seriously, if I become that type buy sexual it's over. Yes I know that in a relationship folks pay. That's another horse with different spots. I have never paid sex or company, why start now?

[darkeyes]

Twice that me membas.. 1st name wos Ford me knos that for sure an we spent a luffly week on 2 seperate occasions drivin round Highlands an Islands.. an Ford wos very gud at keep midgies of us.. an as ne 1 knos Highland midgies r wee buggas..

[tenni]

bensonhurstbiguy
Sex Trade Workers are not for me but if it makes sense to you and you are able to find an escort service that you are comfortable with, I see no reason why not to go that route. I'm sure that you are a big boy and know about the risks about STD's and how to protect yourself.

Whether it is legal or not, is not important. It is unlikely that you would become involved in a sting operation. Smoking a joint is illegal but it has not stopped people from doing it. Sex Trade Workers have been around as long as history has been recorded.

[Karasel]

I have tons of friends who are prostitutes. But I myself have never hired a prostitute. Some of you may know that my first boyfriend was an ex-prostitute. All of my friends who is/was a prostitute were high class and charged anywhere from $200-400 an hour.

Mostly patrons just paid for one hour, sometimes they got someone paying for 2 hours which normally meant that they wanted something "special" or they just wanted to talk.

My advice is to pay for the higher-class ones. They are good at what they do, and are very sexually safe... So the chances of catching/giving a STD is narrowed dramatically as compared to a random streetwalker (no disrespect). And normally when cops go undercover as hookers, they pretend to be the cheap ones you see hanging around street corners (I have cop friends as well). I've never heard of a cop going undercover as a high-class girl/boy, I don't even think they could get by with that.. Takes too much work, have to get a whole new expensive wardrobe and lets not even talk about the photography costs... And then after that you have to find a "manager."

[tenni]

Look people if you wish to have this site be perceived as welcoming,tolerant and accepting of sexual preferences, gender etc., try to use the term that is preferred for this type of job.

Workers in this business call their job..."Sex Trade Workers" and not "prostitutes". Some Sex Trade Workers are attempting to improve how society sees them and wants society to remove the stigma that has been attached to their business.

[darkeyes]

Look people if you wish to have this site be perceived as welcoming,tolerant and accepting of sexual preferences, gender etc., try to use the term that is preferred for this type of job.

Workers in this business call their job..."Sex Trade Workers" and not "prostitutes". Some Sex Trade Workers are attempting to improve how society sees them and wants society to remove the stigma that has been attached to their business.

I agree wivya Tenni.. but unfortunately not all peeps, gay bisexual or str8 hav entirely lost alla ther prejudices bout peeps who work in the sex trade.. 2 me shame it is a word me occasionally uses mesel.. whore is even worse.. an arguably.. the sex trade isn jus those who sell ther bodies or make porn.. apart from those who sell sex toys, sexy lingere an sexy clothes.. those who model them.. those who act on stage, telly an film an becum sex symbols..those who work in cinemas an theatres, those who produce shows an film.. we cud go on.. so peddlin sex a 1 kind or totha is summat more peeps do than jus those who sell ther bodies for sex.. an wen it cums to prostitution.. outside a the sex trade.. me can think a lotsa peeps who an lotsa jobs wich prostitute themsels an hav nowt 2 do wiv sex..

[TwylaTwobits]

Sure Tenni, just as soon as the law quits stating that sex for money is a crime and people who get paid to sleep with others are prostitutes and the crime is no longer booked as prostitution, then we will call everyone sex trade worker.

But just so we are clear........ not all escorts are prostitutes. What I posted was from a new york law site and it was plain as day. Prostitution is illegal, escort is not but some escort services are covers for prostitution.

There are many men and women who work as paid escorts and it's not for sex. They accompany men and women to various functions as arm candy and possibly intelligent conversation. They do not hire out for a quickie normally. That's where the difference lies.

[tenni]

Homosexuality is illegal in some places. Arguing that something is illegal is not valid enough to dismiss a request to call Sex Trade Workers by a term that they prefer.

Why don't you just call the bisexuals on this website "fags" and "perverts"? That is what we may be called by some.

I sense that there is some thought of non acceptance for Sex Trade Workers not too far under your words?

Sure Tenni, just as soon as the law quits stating that sex for money is a crime and people who get paid to sleep with others are prostitutes and the crime is no longer booked as prostitution, then we will call everyone sex trade worker.

But just so we are clear........ not all escorts are prostitutes. What I posted was from a new york law site and it was plain as day. Prostitution is illegal, escort is not but some escort services are covers for prostitution.

There are many men and women who work as paid escorts and it's not for sex. They accompany men and women to various functions as arm candy and possibly intelligent conversation. They do not hire out for a quickie normally. That's where the difference lies.

[rissababynta]

Oh please...

[69luvr]

I think we all ought to understand that so many laws are screwy! Let he who is wiyhout sin, cast the first stone. I see nothing wrong with hiring someone to engage in your fantasys. As long as no one gets hurt, so be it! I hate puritanical morons that want to label others while they have their own secrets. Remember the KATHY WILLETTS story!

[tenni]

I agree with you darkeyes. I admit to having some discomfort with the Sex Trade industry myself. There has been a lot of discussion in my arts community lately about this subject. I have someone in my family that worked as a Sex Trade Worker for awhile. I can see a lot of negatives in this business but will at least use a term that they prefer to be used. Not all Sex Trade Workers are like my family member but some do have issues like her. Still, when a marginalized group requests that we (the public) begin to use a term, I will and promote it.

I agree wivya Tenni.. but unfortunately not all peeps, gay bisexual or str8 hav entirely lost alla ther prejudices bout peeps who work in the sex trade.. 2 me shame it is a word me occasionally uses mesel.. whore is even worse.. an arguably.. the sex trade isn jus those who sell ther bodies or make porn.. apart from those who sell sex toys, sexy lingere an sexy clothes.. those who model them.. those who act on stage, telly an film an becum sex symbols..those who work in cinemas an theatres, those who produce shows an film.. we cud go on.. so peddlin sex a 1 kind or totha is summat more peeps do than jus those who sell ther bodies for sex.. an wen it cums to prostitution.. outside a the sex trade.. me can think a lotsa peeps who an lotsa jobs wich prostitute themsels an hav nowt 2 do wiv sex..

[tenni]

Oh please...........Just keep writing all your threads about your dog, your husband, your kids, your ill friends, your weight...all the stuff that is much more important that this topic. Heaven forbid that this site actually discuss sexual topics.

Oh please...

[darkeyes]

Sure Tenni, just as soon as the law quits stating that sex for money is a crime and people who get paid to sleep with others are prostitutes and the crime is no longer booked as prostitution, then we will call everyone sex trade worker.

But just so we are clear........ not all escorts are prostitutes. What I posted was from a new york law site and it was plain as day. Prostitution is illegal, escort is not but some escort services are covers for prostitution.

There are many men and women who work as paid escorts and it's not for sex. They accompany men and women to various functions as arm candy and possibly intelligent conversation. They do not hire out for a quickie normally. That's where the difference lies.

You're right of course, Twyla.. many are not for hire for fullfilling a persons fantasies.. and performing sex acts for money.. whether they can't be called sex workers is arguable just the same.. because for the most part there remains a sexual connotation.. is not eye candy sexual? Yet on the other hand many escorts, ostensibly working for the respectable end of the market and whose employer does not employ them to be anything other than what you describe, do turn a trick or two as private arrangements outwith their terms of contract. Many are also self employed and God knows what if anything they get up to...

..and prostitution is not a crime in this country, or in very many European countries.. in some.. the Netherlands for instance it is very much regulated like any other business and is as legal and above board if not quite so respectable, as say running a corner shop or a farm. Some countries do make it difficult for them to ply their trade.. my own for instance but it thrives nonetheless but with many dangers and not just from STD's... and those who do get caught out by the Revenue are as liable to pay taxes for their work as anyone else..

[rissababynta]

Oh please...........Just keep writing all your threads about your dog, your husband, your kids, your ill friends, your weight...all the stuff that is much more important that this topic. Heaven forbid that this site actually discuss sexual topics.

Do you even know what I said oh please about? No you don't, because you didn't even ask. Why don't you just keep writing your nitpicky little shit that you always feel the need to push on people.

I used to like you Tenni, but lately you've proven to slowly but surely be turning into a real dickhead, and not even the good kind.

Go find some married dick to suck since that's the only thing you ever seem to feel all THAT pationately about.

I want to say that you are now iggied, but ya know what? No...because I'm just done with this fucking site all together, so therefore there is no point in ignoring you. Maybe I'll be back some day, maybe not, who knows, but for now I'm done. I'm tired of the little bullshit and I'm really tired of pieces of horseshit like you. Fuck you and every other asshole that has violated this place with your manic little attitudes. One minute you're telling me off in a thread, the next your writing to me apologizing. Does anyone else no you do that Tenni? And I'm not the only one to notice your little moodswings so it is NOT just me.

Cat and a few others no how to get ahold of me outside of this site. For those of you who ever want to actually talk, let me know. Otherwise, so long guys. See ya around.

[TwylaTwobits]

Sighs this is getting out of hand... the OP asked for advice based on US american state New York. I gave it. Get over it.

There is absolutely no need for the personal attack. Not every thread on this site needs to be about sex, the lack of sex, the type of sex, the gender of the person you had sex with or what you named your dick.

[Samalina]

Tenni you can be annoying...

[69luvr]

No I have never hired an escort. If I had the money I would hire a CROSS DRESSING bi-sexual person to go to dinner with me. Why? because I think it would help loosen my inhibitions. I see nothing wrong with escorts of this nature. I do not care for lables and lies.

[Donkey_burger]

You might want to ask your girlfriend if she is all right with you hiring a prostitute. That might not what she had in mind when she consented you to have sex with a man.

Other than that, get tested beforehand, and six months after, and use a condom!

DB

[darkeyes]

There is absolutely no need for the personal attack. Not every thread on this site needs to be about sex, the lack of sex, the type of sex, the gender of the person you had sex with or what you named your dick.

Aaaahh.. indeed Twyla sweetie..

[Karasel]

Look people if you wish to have this site be perceived as welcoming,tolerant and accepting of sexual preferences, gender etc., try to use the term that is preferred for this type of job.

Workers in this business call their job..."Sex Trade Workers" and not "prostitutes". Some Sex Trade Workers are attempting to improve how society sees them and wants society to remove the stigma that has been attached to their business.

I'm not being prejudice, true I use the word prostitute a lot.. And I did use the word hooker, only to refer to the vice cops going undercover to bust Johns/Janes. But everyone one I know that is one, refers to themselves as prostitutes, very rarely do they use the title "sex trade worker." Maybe, they'll use "sex tread worker" on their website, or something.

It's not a big deal, they sell sex. It's their job. Most of all the people I know does not take offense. They aren't big into being politically correct. I have the utmost respect for their job, and they earn every dollar they make, considering the personal turmoil they get from their friends/family who does not accept what they do and all the many things that goes a long with it.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Oh please...........Just keep writing all your threads about your dog, your husband, your kids, your ill friends, your weight...all the stuff that is much more important that this topic. Heaven forbid that this site actually discuss sexual topics.

WTF prompted all of this??? Riss has a right to her opinion just the same as You do about whatever it is that You want to post about. I see no valid reason for you attacking her on open forum like that! It was totally uncalled for, not to mention rude and crass. Life isnt ALL about sex Tenni, and if you believe that way then that's your fallacy, no one elses. If thats something You want to do, cool, that's your right and perogitive to do so, but dont liken yourself to a troll by throwing around insults like you have been lately. I thought you were one of the good guys here, but it appears that I was wrong.
Cat

[darkeyes]

Tenni..sumtimes peeps hav the sensitivity of the proverbial bull in a china shop.. 1 thing ya nev dus is hav ago at peeps for ther family an how they feel bout them an wot they share... ya shud feel privileged she letya in.. they hav as much rite as ne 1 else 2 speak bout things that concern 'em no matta how important or trivial.. wot makes human beins special is they can share the trivia a the 1s they luff wiv othas.. the minutiea wich is so important 2 them.. Ris has had worries an she has lil things happen wich u dismiss as meanin nuthin.. its a person's life ya dismiss.. ya shud b fuckin ashamed a yasel..

[bensonhurstbiguy]

Thank you guys for all of the responses to my question. If you don't mind my responding to a few things:

1) I definitely wouldn't go the direction of hiring somebody "off the street" as it were. The reason why I'd go the "escort" direction is because it seems like (other than the legality of the language of an escort service) you are just generally going to end up with a cleaner/more professional person via a service. Just seems safer/smarter, if this is the direction I'm going in (IF, I still haven't decided yet).

2) Donkey_burger brought up a good point about my girlfriend. If she would be okay with it. Truth is, I don't know. I don't even know if I would be comfortable with telling her about it per se. I have joked/mentioned to her that if things ever got real desperate for me, we'd just have to go to Vegas where prostitution is legal. She wasn't against this (not that we had an intense conversation about it, but she definitely showed no signs of discomfort with the idea). I think overall her feeling would be that as long as I'm safe, both health wise and in the eyes of the law, she would ultimately be okay with it. But I just don't know that I could approach the conversation with her.

Right now I'm still not decided. Admittedly, since I posted this question, I've had a few nibbles (so to speak) on a hook-up web site. If any of these work out, then I'm pretty sure I'll be satisfied and not need to consider the escort route. Though of course the major "nibble" I had, which felt like it was leading to a definite hook-up, was followed up by the guy ignoring my e-mail and PM message on the site. So...yeah. This is what I mean by the wasting my limited 'net time on games. It just gets old.

[Jacqui]

yes, I have, always had a fantasy of a trannie, well I found one, fantastic, worth every cent

[Doggie_Wood]

Why don't you just call the bisexuals on this website(1) "fags" and (2) "perverts"?

AH-HUM!!

(1) haven't smoked a fag in many years
(2) that's "MR. Pervert" to you, sir!

Doggie

[Doggie_Wood]

Oh please...........Just keep writing all your threads about your dog, your husband, your kids, your ill friends, your weight...all the stuff that is much more important that this topic. Heaven forbid that this site actually discuss sexual topics.

tenni - what you said was totally uncalled for.
When Rissa wrote "Oh please. . . " - it was not directed at any particular person. So if you took it to be personal to you, you are the one with an inferiority complex and possibly paranoid as well.
If you don't want to be labeled as a troll, stop acting as one.

Doggie