Double Trouble

[dafydd]

So I was with this straight girl the other day and afterward she pointed to my pic of Monroe above the bed and said, "that's a bit gay" and I said yeah, "well more bi really". Then she took her hand off my chest and carried on with some conversation about not really trusting bi guys because there's double the chance of them cheating. Question: Should I have just kicked her out then and there, or invested in reeducating her? Oftentimes these days when I get a whiff of ignorance I totally lose my horn. And quickly couldn't be bothered, got up made coffee and did the whole...have to get up early speech.
Could I have handled this differently?

D
:)

[biwords]

President James Monroe (1758-1831) was gay????? Kewl!!!!!!!!!!!

Sure you could have handled it differently. The only question is whether you wish you'd handled it differently. Do you?

[dafydd]

President James Monroe (1758-1831) was gay????? Kewl!!!!!!!!!!!

Sure you could have handled it differently. The only question is whether you wish you'd handled it differently. Do you?

yes i think I could have done. but i was spent. next time maybe i should suss out their opinions before i pick them up. :(

d

[Skater Boy]

It raises an interesting question for me:

Should I tell potential sexual partners that I am bisexual BEFORE having sex with them? Or even am I OBLIGED to tell them?

Its a tricky one to answer, but for me, if I care about the person, then I will most likely tell them from the start, or at least before we jump into bed.

BUT if its just a bit of fun, and we're both after the same thing, then I don't see any reason to tell them.

HOWEVER, its sometimes cool to "test" people when you meet them... just ask them some discreetly probing questions, and see what their answers reveal about them.

[biwords]

Well, the moral high ground lies in saying "Is this likely to be a material fact -- that is, one that would be likely to seriously enter into the person's decision to sleep with me or not?". If so, mention it.

The moral low ground (but still defensible) is to say "if it means that much to the person, he/she can ask me. No questions = assumption of risk".

Which of these two would you be more comfortable with, ethically? I don't mean when you're in the grip of passion, but now, at the computer? Go with that one.

[Skater Boy]

Well, the moral high ground lies in saying "Is this likely to be a material fact -- that is, one that would be likely to seriously enter into the person's decision to sleep with me or not?". If so, mention it.

The moral low ground (but still defensible) is to say "if it means that much to the person, he/she can ask me. No questions = assumption of risk".

Which of these two would you be more comfortable with, ethically? I don't mean when you're in the grip of passion, but now, at the computer? Go with that one.

I would go with the "moral high ground" if the person was MORE than just "a bit of fun" to me, and "the moral low ground" if he/she was just a casual fling.

Unless I'm feeling cowardly, in which case its ALWAYS the moral low-ground!

In theory, it SHOULDN'T matter if you're bisexual or not in an ideal world. Although I know we don't live in one...

[arana]

I would go with the "moral high ground" if the person was MORE than just "a bit of fun" to me, and "the moral low ground" if he/she was just a casual fling.

Unless I'm feeling cowardly, in which case its ALWAYS the moral low-ground!

In theory, it SHOULDN'T matter if you're bisexual or not in an ideal world. Although I know we don't live in one...
I don't think you need to tell someone if you know that you'll never go further into a relationship with them.

I do think if you get negative feedback from someone about what they think a bisexual is that it's better to find out why they think this and maybe clue them in on the fact not all bisexuals fit a stereotype anymore then all straight people do. Some people you just can't get through to, they feel how they do and you aren't going to change their minds, but you may be able to reach a few open minds.

[Seth C]

Other than your main point, I get annoyed when, people notice I have campy or feminine tastes and imply that I should reject it right then and there, despite the fact that I obviously like it, because OMGI'MAGUY.

They say it like it's some huge revelation that probably nobody has ever told me and this ridiculous belief regarding gender is actually obviously.

Crikey. :mad:

My biomom came for a visit once and she said "you know that nail polish is JUST for girls". Thank you for being supportive, you fucking loser (that was to my mom and not the OP lol).

[arana]

Other than your main point, I get annoyed when, people notice I have campy or feminine tastes and imply that I should reject it right then and there, despite the fact that I obviously like it, because OMGI'MAGUY.

They say it like it's some huge revelation that probably nobody has ever told me and this ridiculous belief regarding gender is actually obviously.

Crikey. :mad:

My biomom came for a visit once and she said "you know that nail polish is JUST for girls". Thank you for being supportive, you fucking loser (that was to my mom and not the OP lol).
Very true Seth. I never understood the whole what's "right and wrong" thing when it comes to boys and girls. Boys aren't suppose to play with dolls unless they're "action figures" ... they're still friggin' dolls. I didn't get dolls when I was little, my dad gave me cars and dump trucks and took me fishing. Why can't a person just like what they like and so be it?

And why do people criticize others tastes in anything? Who says their taste is better and/or why? Just because the media or some eccentric with money says it is? And why are the rich allowed to dress poorly and be "chic" but the poor dress that way and it's "sad" and pitied? :mad: *sigh* people are strange. Ooops, sorry about the ranting.

[wanderingrichard]

Very true Seth. I never understood the whole what's "right and wrong" thing when it comes to boys and girls. Boys aren't suppose to play with dolls unless they're "action figures" ... they're still friggin' dolls. I didn't get dolls when I was little, my dad gave me cars and dump trucks and took me fishing. Why can't a person just like what they like and so be it?

And why do people criticize others tastes in anything? Who says their taste is better and/or why? Just because the media or some eccentric with money says it is? And why are the rich allowed to dress poorly and be "chic" but the poor dress that way and it's "sad" and pitied? :mad: *sigh* people are strange. Ooops, sorry about the ranting.

no rant, hon, you did good..


daf, don't beat yourself up over this.. you now know where she stands....don't subject yourself to the "kennedy syndrome" [ where the little head does the thinking] ..make it using the gray matter to objectively weigh whether you really want to continue any further with her or not.. as for that night, consider it a learning experience.