I just want the cock... not the guy

[MyMyBiGuy]

I have known I was bisexual and have been acting on it for several years now. I am primarily straight, but I just get the urges to suck a guy off and rarely (if he is cool and has a great cock) get fucked. I have never looked at a guy and gotten turned on. It is all about dicks and sucking them and the cum. When I am looking to hook up, if a guy sends me a face picture, I am actually turned off. I want to see his cock, that is all. I cannot imagine being out or having a relationship with a guy like I do with women.

Is this common or what? I have never talked about any of this to anyone. I am glad I found this forum!

[tenni]

Hi MyMyBi
Welcome to the site.
If you read the threads you will find that there are a lot of biguys who are only or mainly attracted to cock and not the face or even body of the guy.
You may stay attracted to just cock or since bisexuality is fluid you may expand your menu. ;)

I would like to point out one of your statements.
"if he is cool and has a great cock) get fucked."
Now, when I look at your words I see that "if" the guy is cool you might like him to fuck you. If you like his cock you will let him stick it in you. You are already expanding your repertoire :) If his personality is something that you like then you may move beyond playing with his cock. It is just a tiny window that may (or may not) suggest that in the future you may expand your options.

[fredtyg]

Yep. Tenni is right. Your case is not unusual. Guys and girls are all over the place in regards their bisexuality.

[like2bepegged]

Finally someone who I can relate to.I love the dick, just cant stand that its attached to a guy. Thats why I like my wife and her eight inch strapon.

[dafydd]

hello, welcome.
Yes it could be that you have a specific attraction/obsessiom toward cocks, maybe then a 'fetish' as such?
or it could be that you compartmentalise your desire for men for some reason.
Your desire for males, specifically, only being attracted to male gentalia , may be more subconsciously chosen than you suspect. The desire is so focused on the genital aspect sex, that to your higher consciousness it manifests as a drive you can't control - you're off the hook in not wanting to choose bisexuality or embrace (but Im not sure you're saying you don't want to explore this....) However, the social aspect of finding a human male attractive who shows you his face, personality, behaviours ..with a name, emotions, is the whole package of a homo lifestyle that might put you off,. It details your bisexuality as more complex than just a 'need' you can't control, but something that you want to embrace

However, swap those two desires around (sexual/social) in what they might mean and consider this:
In some ways, the fetishisation of cock (and cock only) is almost an expression of *pure homosexuality* (within the context of bisexuality), as oppsosed to desiring relationships with men, where emotions and behaviours (that are not always gender specific). It is the male sexual organs that you specifically want/need and could indicate a preternatural desire to be impregnated and breed with a man... and so that puts you..... in a 'female' brain ...with a heterosexual desire.

Let's not carried away though. If you do just want cock specifically in the specific way you mentioned it's more likely a fetish for you. Then you're life is so much easier if you do not have a the need for a social homosexual (bisexual) attraction....there will always be unending and easily accessible amounts of cock available for you to access, in complete anonymity and with less chance of having consequences with your relationships with women.

if this all sounds like a lot of mumbo jumbo fair enough, but then why worry about just wanting cock? There has to be a larger ocean under all this that somehow is starting to be explored. Your okay about identifying as bisexual... so its not a closet issue.. I'd just just enjoy the cocks if were you. That's totally totall NORMAL.

Daf

[MyMyBiGuy]

I think it does fall under the fetish side of things. I do appreciate the look at all the different angles! I think it is more of an oral fetish over all. I love to give head to women as well. And cum, be it male or female, the more the better as far as I am concerned. I think it all relates. But my relationship/emotional attraction has always be to females. When I am with a guy, I am the submissive side. Not to the point of dom/sub, but I am definitely the bottom.

[john10]

Same here. Love the looks and fucking women. I get strong desires to suck cock and ZI jerk off like crazy and cum all over. I don't like to look at men. Waist down is all I want when I get into one of my queer moods!

[Long Duck Dong]

I tend to agree with dafydd.... lol.....

a fetish is not a bad thing, its a expression of oneself in a way that is not really conventional but it helps make the person complete and some people can function better while they are enjoying their fetish than at other times..... its a bit like the smokers that talk about being able to cope better with a smoke in their mouths than without a smoke.... its generally a mental thing..... but there is no real harm it in ( unless people wanna talk about the dangers of smoking etc )

the lack of interest in the male form is not really a aversion to the male body, its just that you do not have any interest and desire for the male body and some people that are focused on the male genitalia, have found that they are actually happier with a trans person that has the body of a female and the genitalia of the male, because it matches what they are most interested in.... the female form and the male genitalia....

you do remind me in a slight way of some guys that refer to themselves as cock worshippers, a loose term that refers to a love of a cock not the owner... and they can be the type of person that would spend all night stroking, caressing, licking kissing and sucking your cock and yet would have no interest in any other interaction with you.....

so do not worry about what the future may hold, enjoy the present and the experiences, and the cocks.....

[Bisexual Explorer]

I find that the sex is always much better when I'm attracted by the guy than by the cock. That's not to say that I'm not attracted by cocks; I am. It's just that sex, for me, is more about the partner than about his cock.
Bisexual Explorer

[MyMyBiGuy]

With women, yes, the partner makes all the difference as far as the sex goes. To an extent, same with a guy I suppose. If I get with a guy and he is too aggressive or too much small talk, it kills the experience of what I am looking for. I am happy with guys that enjoy and cum quick. Also, gloryholes fit in with what I want perfectly, just the cock, not the guy.

[Realist]

Being relationship-oriented myself, this is different than the way I feel. I have to care about, or at least know a person well, before I want to be intimate with them. However, I had a lover, (well, suck-buddy) who felt as the OP does.

We were the best of friends and shared oral sex many times, but he had no interest in being romantic, laying in bed discussing other aspects of a MM relationship, or expressing feelings. He always wanted me to cum first; That would get him aroused to the max, then I'd return the favor. As soon as he recovered, it was back to business as usual....his gay attack was quelled and over for a while!

I understood his idiosyncrasies, accepted them, but always felt that something was missing. Funny, we were in that relationship for 10 years!

[tenni]

post 5
“However, the social aspect of finding a human male attractive who shows you his face, personality, behaviours ..with a name, emotions, is the whole package of a homo lifestyle that might put you off,. It details your bisexuality as more complex than just a 'need' you can't control, but something that you want to embrace “


Daf
Maybe, maybe not. When you refer to social aspect and then go back to a physical aspect is where you start to lose me. If a man finds another man socially attractive what does he base the attraction on? It is not as much his physical appearance but his behaviour imo. Often we call such m/m relationships friendships, do we not? If we have an emotional reaction to our friends they are not our lovers. A guy might even have an emotionally connection with another male friend and not want to suck his cock. Now, that emotional connection is different than an emotional connection with a sexual partner/lover...is it not? If his friend dies, he may cry deeply at that loss but never have wanted to suck his cock even if they are both bisexual or gay.

Isn’t a “homo lifestyle” much more than the physical? It is a social network that may include sexual contact. Is a bisexual lifestyle for a man different than a homo lifestyle? I think so.


"expression of *pure homosexuality* (within the context of bisexuality), as opposed to desiring relationships with men, where emotions and behaviours (that are not always gender specific)".

Are you stating that homosexuality in its purest sense is all about cock?..lol

[twntexas]

Same here. Love the looks and fucking women. I get strong desires to suck cock and ZI jerk off like crazy and cum all over. I don't like to look at men. Waist down is all I want when I get into one of my queer moods!

Me too. I can get a rush from sucking the cum out of a guy or getting my rump humped. The thought of kissing/cuddling with a guy is enough to make me want to throw up though. Only thing better than pussy juice or cum is the two mixed together.

[abstractreality2]

To MyMyBiguy,
Wow, you express my thoughts 100% accurately. To me it is ALL about the cock. I love looking at at, holding, stroking, sucking a hard cock. Cuddling/kissing etc. with a guy is of ZERO interest! I guess I'm superficial, but perhaps I do just have a cock fetish. I even see a pic of my own cock and get a boner! So, seeing some other dude's throbbing cock gets me horny as hell. But, I've had very little luck finding guys like me who just want to enjoy sucking each other's cocks.

[curiousOnt]

To MyMyBiguy,
Wow, you express my thoughts 100% accurately. To me it is ALL about the cock. I love looking at at, holding, stroking, sucking a hard cock. Cuddling/kissing etc. with a guy is of ZERO interest! I guess I'm superficial, but perhaps I do just have a cock fetish. I even see a pic of my own cock and get a boner! So, seeing some other dude's throbbing cock gets me horny as hell. But, I've had very little luck finding guys like me who just want to enjoy sucking each other's cocks.

I feel the same way......love seeing a pic of a hard cock and thinking about licking and sucking on it........but no kissing or caressing..............

[Plumhead2]

Count me in here too. Just interested in a guy from the waist down and knees up. Kissing/cuddling with a guy . . . nope! I think that with a woman that I am romantically involved with, the sex becomes lovemaking, an act of bonding. With MM, it is just about the sex, just about the pleasure. Sex is different from lovemaking, and sometimes you just don't want the complexities of lovemaking, you just want to get hard (and/or get someone hard) and cum (and/or make someone cum) and do it quick. Lot's of guys I have chatted with feel this way too. Isn't it just like masturbation when you are also in a relationship. Yes, you have lovemaking with your partner, but still sometimes you sneak off alone and stroke one off quickly for the quick pleasure.

[MyMyBiGuy]

...Only thing better than pussy juice or cum is the two mixed together.

100% damn right!

@abstract, I don't even want anything in return most of the time. Just to suck him off and him go. I am the same way when I get really horny, I will surf for cock pics and especially cumshots. If a guy wants to much contact with me while I am sucking, it turns me off as that is not why I am doing it. Grabbing my head is ok, but once they start squeezing my nipples or wanting to do me, it is just a killer for my mood.

[jja4a]

I thouht I was pretty much alone in wanting what you've all described. It's nice to know that I'm not the only guy that sometimes wants to suck a nice hard cock but isn't into any other sort of male/male sexual relationship. You all stay safe...

[Im283TN]

I have known I was bisexual and have been acting on it for several years now. I am primarily straight, but I just get the urges to suck a guy....

Is this common or what? I have never talked about any of this to anyone. I am glad I found this forum!

What you wrote is exactly how I feel, except my wife knows I am bi. She claims she knew it before I ever told her I had sucked a guy before hooking up with her.
I don't know how she knew.

[MyMyBiGuy]

*** ok, just went back and re-read this and sorry for the brain dump... it just came out! This all has just occurred last week and over the weekend. ***
My wife knows I have been with a couple of guys in the past. So I guess she knows I am bi to an extent. We actually have been discussing a lot sexually recently. She has had girlfriends in the past, but says she has no desire for a woman now.
I actually started the conversation with her by asking if she wanted to be with a woman. Not looking for a threesome or anything, just not wanting her to desire something I could not provide. She told me no and asked, "what about you?". I told her I think about it sometimes and explained what I did in the first post here. She took it hard and was upset that she thought I was wanting something that she could not give me. I told her no, it was not like that. I told her that she would be the perfect man for me if she had a dick. :)
So she calmed down and apologized to me the next day stating that she reacted that way because of her own insecurities from past marriages and it was not because of me. I understand that, she has have a couple of pretty nasty marriages before we got together.
I felt very relieved after our discussion when everything calmed down. So the next day, I initiated a conversation by asking her what she thought about me giving her head after I came in her. She said ok, and surprised the hell out of me by asking, "What if we did 69?" I said absolutely and asked her if this turned her on. She told me yes. I was floored. She does give me head to completion, so i know she does not have an issue with cum.
The conversation continued and I told her that she could tell me anything and I would never judge her. Is there anything that she has wanted to do that she had not told me? Here is where I was completely speechless, she said she wanted to fuck me. Not like she wanted to fuck, she wanted a strap-on to fuck me. The whole dominatrix deal (not whipping and all that). Tie me up, make me suck it and fuck me. Well holy shit! I said yes, of course, and she asked if I thought she was a freak. I said absolutely not and it was amazing to me that what she wanted to do I wanted her to do very much.
So, we are going shopping for toys that will fuck her and me and are going to go from there. Since then, we cannot look at each other without getting turned on. I think this was a great thing to happen and I cannot tell you how it feels to be accepted by her like this and me accept her as well. All of this just happened to coincide with me finding this sight. Maybe it was a sign!!!

[MyMyBiGuy]

I realized that the above post should have probably been it's own thread... but it will not let me edit it even after I joined the club. So Sorry. Please ignore it or moderator, feel free to remove it from this thread. I will post it elsewhere.

[cbb83]

Who knows - maybe getting the strap on from her and eating her out after sex will satiate your cravings and serve to keep you from straying. Good luck with everything!

[luvtocum]

OK well at least i'm not the only one who feels this way. As long as they got a nice cock i don't care what they look like.

[abstractreality2]

Wow, well put plumhead!

[abstractreality2]

Not even a mutual suck? I wouldn't be a bit turned on by squeezing your nipples...nope. But sucking your cock, yeah!

[BiDaveDtown]

According to Tenni you'd be LOL "Straight" or a SMSM OP. :rolleyes: The idea that you can somehow have a fetish for a penis is showing how you don't know what a fetish is since a penis is already sexual and it's not a true or actual fetish like hands, feet, etc. are.

[cbb83]

Actually, it's showing that you don't know what a fetish is. Go read some psychological text books - fuzzy ass social science that psychology is, they have made some useful observations. Also, the only thing inherently sexual about a penis is part of its function. You need to learn what perspectives are.

[tenni]

According to Tenni you'd be LOL "Straight" or a SMSM OP. :rolleyes: The idea that you can somehow have a fetish for a penis is showing how you don't know what a fetish is since a penis is already sexual and it's not a true or actual fetish like hands, feet, etc. are.

BiDave
Nope. I did not post such a statement on this thread. Read post 2 again. As far as SMSM that is just an article that I posted. I think that all referencing to "straight" "gay" is not appropriate when discussing bisexuality. "Same Sex/gender" and "Opposite Sex/Gender seems more appropriate to stop confusing ourselves that we are one or the other. We, bisexuals, are not. We are a separate sexuality..or perhaps sexualities under the bi umbrella term.

We do seem to be a very wide spectrum though and that includes those attracted to cock and not the rest of the body or person. I am not 100% certain but I think referring to an attraction to genetils is not a "fetish"...it is an attraction to a genetils just as attraction to breasts is not a "fetish". In that respect, BiDave, we agree.

[MyMyBiGuy]

Ok, I guess fetish was obviously a bad choice of word. How about obsession? I don't know... I really, really, like them a lot!!! LOL

[AdamKadmon43]

I have known I was bisexual and have been acting on it for several years now. I am primarily straight, but I just get the urges to suck a guy off and rarely (if he is cool and has a great cock) get fucked. I have never looked at a guy and gotten turned on. It is all about dicks and sucking them and the cum. When I am looking to hook up, if a guy sends me a face picture, I am actually turned off. I want to see his cock, that is all. I cannot imagine being out or having a relationship with a guy like I do with women.

Is this common or what? I have never talked about any of this to anyone. I am glad I found this forum!

Why not ??? A man is just a life support system for a penis anyhow.

[bi4asplay]

I do enjoy cock. I do enjoy pics of them.Without a lady there I do not enjoy a man, but still like the pics.The first time we are together the cock is all that matters, unless he has a really ugly body. If play comes again I have to like more about him that just his cock. LIke how well he used it in me. If the lady I am with wants him to play with us I will go with it. When I look a pics of guys the cock is my interest. A guy my late wife and I played with for a couple of years was of no attraction to me,But she liked to play with him and liked to watch him fuck me.I always got turned on mainly because of how fired up she got when we played.

[BJ Hunter]

To MyMyBiguy,
Wow, you express my thoughts 100% accurately. To me it is ALL about the cock. I love looking at at, holding, stroking, sucking a hard cock. Cuddling/kissing etc. with a guy is of ZERO interest! I guess I'm superficial, but perhaps I do just have a cock fetish. I even see a pic of my own cock and get a boner! So, seeing some other dude's throbbing cock gets me horny as hell. But, I've had very little luck finding guys like me who just want to enjoy sucking each other's cocks.

I'm with you 100% on that. It's the cock, not the guy thats attached. A nice hard cock in track pants or boxers just sends me into a lust for his cock that I'm sure others here understand.
I wish you were close by. I bet we could be buddies!

[bothwaysnow]

pretty much me. My 1st time was with a gay guy when I was 20.(now 66). Had a lot to drink and ended up at his apt. Did all the kissing and nipple sucking, which was pleasant, but it was sucking his cock and swallowing his cum was the real turn-on. That part was AWESOME. i would consider the whole thing with the right guy but, in the end, it's all about his cock.

[stillman234]

I'm the same way....really don't care what the guy looks like. Not turned on by guys, just their cock and balls. I don't care how old they are. I don't want to be kissed, nipples touched or too much hands all over my body (except my cock and balls). Only interested in exploring, licking, kissing cock until they cum. I don't even care if I cum, just love knowing I got another guy so excited he ejaculated.

[notmacbi]

Hey I'm not alone! Awesome! I haven't ever sucked a cock yet I'm absolutely mezmorized by the idea of it! Flat out I would not kiss dude nor do I have the desire to be fucked by dude. Though when I see nice cock and balls pictures I definitely get very turned on and start fantasizing about sucking it off! I/we, my wife and I have played with the stuff to have her fuck me... And yes I will let her. Gosh if she only had a cock. We play around with her sucking and playing with my moobs and fantasize about me sucking a nice big cock to completion. One of my favs. Who knows we may get there someday!

[dafydd]

Daf
Maybe, maybe not. When you refer to social aspect and then go back to a physical aspect is where you start to lose me. If a man finds another man socially attractive what does he base the attraction on? It is not as much his physical appearance but his behaviour imo. Often we call such m/m relationships friendships, do we not? If we have an emotional reaction to our friends they are not our lovers. A guy might even have an emotionally connection with another male friend and not want to suck his cock. Now, that emotional connection is different than an emotional connection with a sexual partner/lover...is it not? If his friend dies, he may cry deeply at that loss but never have wanted to suck his cock even if they are both bisexual or gay.

Yes true. like a bromance? I think I was trying (badly) to differentiate between lust and love. Wanting to fall in love with a man and not just having sex with one.


a “homo lifestyle” much more than the physical? It is a social network that may include sexual contact. Is a bisexual lifestyle for a man different than a homo lifestyle? I think so.

lifestyle was a lazy choice of word at the time.. maybe more like homosexual domesticity?


Are you stating that homosexuality in its purest sense is all about cock?..lol

no not necessarily.. good question tenni..maybe i was hinting at that there, but on reflection rereading....there is so much more involved...However id imagine pretty much all guys that suck dick are acting on a homosexual impulse,. Homosexuality is not therefore in its purest sense about sucking cock, but sucking cock is in its purest sense a homosexual act.

[dafydd]

According to Tenni you'd be LOL "Straight" or a SMSM OP. :rolleyes: The idea that you can somehow have a fetish for a penis is showing how you don't know what a fetish is since a penis is already sexual and it's not a true or actual fetish like hands, feet, etc. are.

im genuinely confused on this one. have been looking around the net but its all contradictory. so a fetish is something that takes an ordinarily nonsexual thing and makes it sexual? id go with that, but for some people hands, feet, toes are sexual things, and for lesbians for instance a penis is not sexual.. Who defines what is inherently sexual or not?
Or do u mean a fetish cannot exist for anything (related to specifically) sexual organs?

My (narrow?) definition of a fetish was sexualising anything that takes it out of the normal context of its functioning/use/position and imbues obsessionally with a sexual degree far greater than if it were the sum of its parts.
In this case, sure dicks are great but WITH THE REST...so to only specifically want to look/suck/wank a hard dick (flacid? forget it), excluding the balls, the hair, and any sense that it is actually connected to a man (dicks in floating in space - or glory holes...) that sounds like an obessesion with dick...
...the dick could be attached to a bb-gun, or wall mounted, or freshly cut off bobbit-style for all the admirer cares. I mean that's a dick WAY out of context ...but still hyper sexualised....that's why i thought fetish. I dunno. I don't think i really have any fetishes myself...

[boyboy]

exactly the same way

[always curious]

I thought I was all alone in my thinking. There is hope for me yet! Lol. I haven't acted on my curiosities as of yet. However, if I knew the guy had the same thoughts as me, I'd be much more interested in it

[randy1149]

Kissing a man would make me throw up... sucking his cock turns me on swallowing down his load.
I never understood why women sucked cock until I sucked one my self. An exploding cock in my
mouth is the most euphoric experience I've ever had.

[Waylon]

If I am going to perform fellatio on a man, I do prefer that he be attractive and well-built. I do not enjoy making out but do enjoy pecs and nipple play both on me and on him if possible. Once the cock is exposed, I can get hot even if he is not totally attractive. I also enjoy it when he puts his hand or hands behind my head to guide me as I perform my magic. I wear my hair long, usually tied back in a ponytail and many men enjoy having a "handle" to grab onto, especially when they cum.

[twntexas]

I have known I was bisexual and have been acting on it for several years now. I am primarily straight, but I just get the urges to suck a guy off and rarely (if he is cool and has a great cock) get fucked. I have never looked at a guy and gotten turned on. It is all about dicks and sucking them and the cum. When I am looking to hook up, if a guy sends me a face picture, I am actually turned off. I want to see his cock, that is all. I cannot imagine being out or having a relationship with a guy like I do with women.

Is this common or what? I have never talked about any of this to anyone. I am glad I found this forum!

I dont know how common it is but its the same with me. I love too suck the cum out of guys, and like getting it in my other end too, but the thought of kissing/cuddling with them is enough to make me want to puke.

[DiamondDog]

If all you want me for is my penis that happens to be large and intact with a foreskin. No thanks. I'm not your or anyone else's human dildo and this includes women too.

[onesucker4u]

I am really into riding a dick. I like it when my girlfriend starts kissing him ,sorta distracting him from me, and I start sucking his dick. She lays him back on the bed and covers his face with her pussy while I lube him up, straddle and ride his dick while he licks her pussy- this is my perfect experience, not even looking at his face.

[dafydd]

I dont know how common it is but its the same with me. I love too suck the cum out of guys, and like getting it in my other end too, but the thought of kissing/cuddling with them is enough to make me want to puke.

why does it make you vomit? I mean if it does, it does... but why?

[BiJoe696]

Kind of the same for me, I enjoy kissing and living with women, not men for whatever reason. Whats I do enjoy with men is the ease of getting to the action. Lets get naked and enjoy ourselves.
:bipride::flag3::flag2::male:

[rodman2005]

If you just want the cock try going to the baths. Not every person wants a relationship there, either. They want satisfaction and understand. I get mine and I help out others as well. We love our cocks and want relief and yet fun with other dicks and balls and nudity, sucking cock is just one thing but I crave cock in my mouth and my dick in a warm mouth as well.~! Slurps~!

[Long Duck Dong]

im genuinely confused on this one. have been looking around the net but its all contradictory. so a fetish is something that takes an ordinarily nonsexual thing and makes it sexual? id go with that, but for some people hands, feet, toes are sexual things, and for lesbians for instance a penis is not sexual.. Who defines what is inherently sexual or not?
Or do u mean a fetish cannot exist for anything (related to specifically) sexual organs?

My (narrow?) definition of a fetish was sexualising anything that takes it out of the normal context of its functioning/use/position and imbues obsessionally with a sexual degree far greater than if it were the sum of its parts.
In this case, sure dicks are great but WITH THE REST...so to only specifically want to look/suck/wank a hard dick (flacid? forget it), excluding the balls, the hair, and any sense that it is actually connected to a man (dicks in floating in space - or glory holes...) that sounds like an obessesion with dick...
...the dick could be attached to a bb-gun, or wall mounted, or freshly cut off bobbit-style for all the admirer cares. I mean that's a dick WAY out of context ...but still hyper sexualised....that's why i thought fetish. I dunno. I don't think i really have any fetishes myself...

people get confused by the difference between fetish and paraphilia.... cos paraphilia is the one that deals with sexual interest and attraction to non human aspects or aspects of people / situations that are not normally of a sexual interest to the person so a paraphilia is based around sexual arousal that is not part of a normal situation for EACH person seperately and that is why one persons sexual attraction to a gender, can actually be another persons paraphila.....


here are some examples of paraphila in people, that can also be a normal behievour in other people......

teleiophilia is the sexual arousal based around adults ( pedophilia refers to children )
pygophila is the sexual arousal based around buttocks
heterophilia is the sexual arousal based around the understanding that a person is heterosexual
scopophilia is the sexual arousal based around watching sexual interaction of others, either dressed or naked

even homosexuality was once classed as a paraphilia.....

the issue is that genitalia are viewed as a sexual object and that creates the issue in that it can negate a persons paraphilia, while in fact the person may have a sexual arousal triggered by foreskins, not the penis, just the foreskin and the images they get in their head around the foreskin retracting, etc.......

now if you excuse me, i will leave you to think about it and come to your own conclusions, and wait to be told that I have no idea what I am talking about, by my resident site stalker

[tenni]

Fetish versus Paraphilia

"Sometimes people use the word “fetish” to imply any kind of “atypical” sexual interest, or kink. For sex researchers.., “fetish” specifically refers to a strong sexual preoccupation with an object, material or body part....... Usually the focus of a fetish is something not traditionally considered sexual.

“Paraphilia,” according to Robert T. Francouer’s The Complete Dictionary of Sexology,means compulsively responding in a sexual way to an unusual or socially unacceptable stimulus.

....The most recent edition, the DSM-IV, only describes paraphilia as a psychiatric disorder if it causes distress to the individual or harm to others.

Fetishism, as defined above, is a subcategory of paraphilia, but only qualifies as a disorder if it causes distress or harm."

http://kinseyconfidential.org/sexual-fetish-blog-post/

.................................................. .................................................. ............

interesting.

A craving for cock is still not a fetish nor paraphilia because a cock is traditionally considered sexual.

Looking at a cock as a stimulus for attraction is socially acceptable in the mainstream hetero society if you are a woman..maybe a man as well in some societies? ..ie accept same sex attraction as "normal".

Craving cock is not a psychiatric disorder unless it upsets distresses you that you crave cock or harms others. You're ok if you crave cock whether you crave the rest of the man or not. Relax about it. You're not crazy ;)

[switchitter2]

It`s perfectly fine if you just want to suck cock and swallow cum...many many so called str8married/or completely bi,gay men suck dick every day without knowing the man attached ..cocks are everywhere needing a blowjob..at your workplace, the "Y", wherever there are men and their always ready cocks, you can find a penis to suckle...I suck dick everyday from my so called str8/married neighbor and he sucks me with no labels attached....labels are for cans and bottles not for humans...so suck dick and save the world as they say..:tongue:

[4me4once]

Ok so I am new to the site and glad to know that I am not the only one who just wants the dick. I spend a great deal of time thinking of having my dick sucked and doing the same just have not figured out how to find that first one, and how in the hell do you start that conversation!?

[JLep12]

Ok so I am new to the site and glad to know that I am not the only one who just wants the dick. I spend a great deal of time thinking of having my dick sucked and doing the same just have not figured out how to find that first one, and how in the hell do you start that conversation!?

Somewhat similar for me. I have been actively seeking a guy to blow but it's hard (hehe). Primarily I'm afraid of STD's and then a close second is discretion / comfortability with said guy. I have zero interest in holding hands with a man, kissing their lips, cuddling, or anything remotely close to that. The gloryhole would be my haven if I wasn't so terrified of disease. My haven.

In fact, I'm not even interested in having my cock sucked. I just want to suck dick. I think all the porn I've watched and being on the receiving end of blowjobs all my life has evoked my curiosity in being the sucker, not the suckee.

How does one find a clean cock to suck with NSA? AND have the certainty that there are no underlying disease risks...

[JimmyNewJersey]

Thats exactly how I feel. No bromance, no face pics, just give me that cock. I love to give head, which is why I am so good at it. There is nothing better than to suck and stroke a clean, hard, cut, cock and hear the guy moan when he shoots!

[1PAULETTE]

I am with you. All my interest is in his COCK too. He could be ugly which means nothing. 1Paulette

[topper99florida]

On reading the majority of posts, I guess I must be the exception. It's not just the cock, it's the whole package. He doesn't have to be Tom Cruise, but it's a real plus if he is.

After some experience, I imagine I could be labeled a top. It's greedy of me, I know, but I like to have a man suck me at length, and then ride him with both my hands grasping his ass. However, I like all the stuff in between too. Rolling around in the sheets, nipple suckling, ass grabbing, kissing, etc, etc, is an incredible turn-on.

When things are really clicking, I can even dig the bromance ;)

I've tried the simple cock thing, from both the sucking and being sucked perspective. And while it's immediate, it's less satisfying. To make matters more complex however, I have found that simply suckling on a woman's breasts is incredibly satisfying, and relaxing all in its own. I could seemingly do this forever without needing to see what woman owned the breasts, or needing to bother with any of her other naughty bits.

[Gearbox]

How does one find a clean cock to suck with NSA? AND have the certainty that there are no underlying disease risks...
You don't! Not with a stranger anyway. Not unless you stick a rubber on it first.
The chances of getting STI's from sucking cock are comparitively low, but are never impossible. I've never sucked a rubbered cock, and never got an STD/STI. But you might get something from your very first blowjob.
Not trying to put you off btw, but it's best you know the risks and get yourself checked up regulary if you do play.

[over_ezy]

I'm the same way, drawn to a guys cock and balls like a moth to a flame...but quickly get trurned off by love making with him. I do enjoy getting fucked occasionaly but its always by being so truned on by the guys cock.

[ferreror]

That is the way I am too. My fantasies are about a cock and what it can do to me and what I can do to it. I am not sexually attracted to the rest of the guy. I have never acted on my fantasies and I hope I never will as I am comitted to my wife.

The only fantasy in this area I would like to come true would be for my wife to get a feeldoe or a realdoe and use it on me :)

[sunman9000]

i am only interested in nice clean cocks to play with. nothing about a guy turns me on except the sight of a nice cock

[DiamondDog]

I dont know how common it is but its the same with me. I love too suck the cum out of guys, and like getting it in my other end too, but the thought of kissing/cuddling with them is enough to make me want to puke. That's very odd. I can understand if you do not like kissing anyone at all as there are people like this but why does the thought of kissing or cuddling a man want to make you vomit? I can understand if you're completely icked out by rimming, fisting, urethral sounds or other sex acts since those are things that myself and many other people do not want to do but why get grossed out by kissing a man or cuddling with him? If all someone wants me for is my penis that happens to be large and intact with a foreskin. No thanks. I'm not anyone else's human dildo and this includes women too.

[Neils]

New guy here. Just the D for me please. Like I wrote in my profile--- for me, women are the full meal deal. On the other hand men are just boxes of cereal and I only want the toy at the bottom of the bag. :impleased

As for the kissing thing, it's his masculinity that turns me off from kissing another man. On the other hand, I could totally see myself getting liplocked and tongue tied with a feminine CD or Tgurl. In fact I have my sights set on one pretty thing right now. It's up in the air on whether we'll even connect, if we do hook up I predict it will be amazing.

[Mickbi]

I feel the same way. I'll suck his cock and maybe let him use my back door, but looking at a guys body or kissing a guy turns me off. I save the real intimacy for the girls.

[cocklovers]

thats what i say, stick your cock in my mouth, or stick your cock in my ass, and fill my mouth with cum. no touchy feely stuff

[HotBiStudPhila]

get a shemale

[Spanishbob]

I am new here as well. But I have to disagree with the comment that kissing the man is a non-starter. I too am only interested in the cock and not the man. Many of the cocks I have sucked and which have fucked me, have belonged to guys I wouldn't bother with outside of sex. But the cock, just beautiful and the cum absolutely delicious. When my cock has been stroked by a man the lust overcomes everything else and I have had much mind-blowing kissing with tongues exploring each others mouth. In fact I remember times when it made me feel like a woman. In sex I find myself treating all men and all women the same. Give it everything you have and the results are sheer sexual ecstacy.
But everyone is entitled to their own opinions and experiences. Sex is just wonderful no matter who with.

[VZR1800]

I guess for me it would depend. Smooth face, no facial hair, attractive, I could want the face just as much as the cock. The cock is obviously the end-all, be-all of the encounter, but a nice face would ad to it for sure.

[like2bepegged]

exactly the way I feel. Want the cock, not the guy. Go figure.

[jem_is_bi]

It started out with me that way 8 yrs ago, with my present partner.

[MarysLover]

OMG I totally had to register this forum to vent on this thread. I am a 30 year old female at my wits end about my sexuality lol
I have always felt this way. I fall in love with women. Hard. But in bed never had satisfactory experiences with women. Ive been falling for women as long as I can remember. Since I was a child. I never looked twice at a guy until I got off birth control that I was taking for acne when I was 24. It doesnt help that my gf NEVER wanted to have sex, it was a real chore for her to touch me. Then I starting having INTENSE craving for men. I mean, not for men, for their dick. Old and young alike, it didnt matter. I was penis obsessed. More or less depending on the time of my menstrual cycle. I was questioning hardcore. Didnt understand what was happening to me. Id been with my gf for two years and didnt want to turn my life around. I got back on birth control eventually and resumed my life with her until she left me for a friend 5 years later. Then I went on a dick binge. I mean, for 2 years I was unstoppable. I fucked 15 coworkers, 3 girls 12 guys, at work sometimes, I craved being used. I think my hormones are out of whack. I become somewhat emotionally attracted to the guys I had the best sex with, I even thought I fell for one but obviously it was for the sex. He was mean to me, a real asshole. I never connected to guys, I dont get them, their ways dont work for me, the way they think, I dont know, it doesnt appeal to me. Physically I guess I became somewhat attracted to very few. But its the dick. Ive fucked guys I thought were ugly, it didnt matter who they were, I wouldnt kiss them or hold them they were just a dick. Now, since the last douchebags gave me gonhorreah I decided it was time to put a stop to this crazy life... and met a woman, OMG, she is everything I ever wanted and more and we have this mad sexual chemistry. She is SO beautiful Ive never been this attracted to someone. But I still crave dick. And when i crave it it comes with a vengence. And it drives me crazy really, because all I want to want is my darling. this amazing woman that I love with all my heart. What to do? This sucks.

[Realist]

ML, it looks like you are in possession of your own set of desires!

We've often discussed the sexual pendulum, here. It can be unique to just one of us. Men seem to be the ones who are most likely to go for the penis, rather than the personality. But you seem to feel that way, too.

You know what you like and what you don't and that's probably not going to change. Don't let it bug you; I'd think that you might as well just accept it.

However, if your lover would not be happy, if she found out, then you're got an issue that should be resolved.

Considered therapy?

[jem_is_bi]

1. You're probably a guy and not a woman, and making up everything you wrote. 2. Stop being such a whore or slut and sleeping around, and having unprotected sex since that's how you got an STD.
WOW! Are you for real!
Amazing!!
I assume you realize that if your wrong, your just crapped on a person that is trying to do what is right for her and her friend.
No. That is obviously not where you are at.

[MarysLover]

ML, it looks like you are in possession of your own set of desires!

We've often discussed the sexual pendulum, here. It can be unique to just one of us. Men seem to be the ones who are most likely to go for the penis, rather than the personality. But you seem to feel that way, too.

You know what you like and what you don't and that's probably not going to change. Don't let it bug you; I'd think that you might as well just accept it.

However, if your lover would not be happy, if she found out, then you're got an issue that should be resolved.

Considered therapy?

Well the first time I had sex w my gf we had it non stop for 2 days lol and it was wonderful but I was missing that part. I'm guessing a strap on should be enough? But I don't know. I am totally in love w this girl but on and off during my cycle I get dick obsessed, its not like just desire, it takes over my whole mind. Like wake up at night bothered by those intrusive thoughts like freaking out. I saw a sexologist who recommends the pill.
So I'm gonna take that very soon... My gf knows and that freaked her out and we are gonna see how to satisfy me

[MyMyBiGuy]

A strap on is a pretty good substitute. My wife and I have covered all of mine and her desires and have a great sex life now. But I still would love a cock that cums! That is one of the best things I like about sucking cock. Strangely enough, once I "came out" to my wife, she had been thinking the same things she would like to try. Basically a full gender reversal. It is very fun and she likes me dressed all slutty. LOL It can be worked out, just be honest with your partner!

[luvcock400]

Yes you have the right idea I love cock but not the man I truly believe my ole lady wants to fuck me but is scared to say it so I'm going to bring it up
Well I'll be damed I needed to her that has Bern posted

[BiPantylover]

There have been many responses that agree with your idea of wanting the cock only. I mostly agree with you, when I get horny all I want is hard cock to suck and take the cum. I have never looked at man and thought, well he's attractive, I'd like to do him. Having said that,I normally won't suck any ole cock. It helps if the cock is nice and the guy is at least resonable looking and has some amount of personality. I can never imagine "dating" a guy. I am still very turned on by women and want to spend most of the time with women. But when I get those urges, I really just want a hard cock to suck and swallow his cum. I have never done anal, but have been fantasizing about about it a lot lately. I really do want to try it. But again, just for the sex not the guy. I'm happy to find out I'm not alone in this approach. So where are all you cock guys I need it bad!

[large dick]

I agree I do not like to be with men who want me just for my dick only and who refuse to kiss me or even date. It's a MAJOR turnoff for me and lots of other bisexual men I've met.

[larcstar]

You are the first person to sum up exactly how I feel. The only difference is I haven't acted on it yet, but I'd really like to.

[BareProf]

I crave, love and dream of sucking cock. I've only sucked a few over my years, thrill watching porn because of the cock involved, always of fine size, shaved and producing a fine load of cum. But I want foreplay too, just as I do with a woman. I want to be nude with the guy, like his personality and want his cock in my hand, mine in his as we sit side by side talking of sex. rubbing the precum over our cock heads or watching porn. Then I want to be on my knees sucking him, making him moan then cum in my mouth, down my throat. It won't matter if he wants to jerk me off or blow me after. I have the taste of his cream down my throat and it tingles. I have the memory and my precum flows over my cock. I've had his cock and just as my desire for pussy, I want another one or his again.

[fun2bhung]

I know just how you feel, I feel the same way. Thinking about sucking cock gets me hard as hell but the idea of kissing is a turn off. Having a buddy that likes to give and receive head on a regular basis would be great.

[CamStar94]

Same here haha..I know some bisexuals have the urge to date other men or even have romantic relationships with them as well. I'm not against that idea but for me the thought of lying close to a man and being in love just doesn't mix together. I have also had people tell me this feeling may change with time, but right now, as it has been for the last 3 or 4 years, it's primarily sexual.

[cuttin2dachase]

I definitely want the cock. That being said, I do enjoy romance and intimacy with men...kissing, making out, rubbing, stroking, licking and mutual cock worship. I adore sucking cock with men who know how to suck mine. I can make love to a man as easily as with a woman, but it's just temporary love and the taboo of two men rolling around in bed like 2 lesbians is a huge turn on for me. I can only be emotionally attached to women but I can bond sexually with men too.

[leodecatur]

I hope that you tried the strap-on. You might also just consider getting a good collection of very well made dildos and using those when you get the urge. Hope that everything works out for you and your GF.
Well the first time I had sex w my gf we had it non stop for 2 days lol and it was wonderful but I was missing that part. I'm guessing a strap on should be enough? But I don't know. I am totally in love w this girl but on and off during my cycle I get dick obsessed, its not like just desire, it takes over my whole mind. Like wake up at night bothered by those intrusive thoughts like freaking out. I saw a sexologist who recommends the pill.
So I'm gonna take that very soon... My gf knows and that freaked her out and we are gonna see how to satisfy me

[Tuzz2014]

I propose a new two-bagger concept. You meet the guy with a paper bag over your head (with eyeholes and mouth hole). He also has a bag on his head (eyeholes, mouth hole). Have sex and leave. The Unknown Bisexual.

[amida27]

This is exactly how I feel as well. My question is, how do you get past the lack of desire for the actual guy so that you can get as far as the cock? So far any attempt I've made was aborted as soon as I saw a guy standing there.

[1funguy]

On reading the majority of posts, I guess I must be the exception. It's not just the cock, it's the whole package. He doesn't have to be Tom Cruise, but it's a real plus if he is.

... but I like to have a man suck me at length, and then ride him with both my hands grasping his ass. However, I like all the stuff in between too. Rolling around in the sheets, nipple suckling, ass grabbing, kissing, etc, etc, is an incredible turn-on.

When things are really clicking, I can even dig the bromance ;)

I've tried the simple cock thing, from both the sucking and being sucked perspective. And while it's immediate, it's less satisfying. To make matters more complex however, I have found that simply suckling on a woman's breasts is incredibly satisfying, and relaxing all in its own. I could seemingly do this forever without needing to see what woman owned the breasts, or needing to bother with any of her other naughty bits.

I agree with you, it's about pleasure, my suck buddy and I do this all the time. Having your body pleasured before the main event is akin to foreplay. We usually shower together to start playing together Getting turned on by sucking nipples, kissing, ass play, slipping down sampling the pre-cum and back to a nipple or navel suck with tongue inserted etc. before having my or his cock sucked is all build up to the climax. It takes time, says you appreciate the person, they are important as you are receiving pleasure in return. It's using the brain as an added sexual organ (which it is) to the higher good of connecting. I have to say kissing is really sensual. It let's you know how well your partner can use his/her tongue and is into sex! As to sucking on a man or woman's breast, it's as satisfying as sucking a cock to me. The body is a wonderful playground needing to be explored as everyone is different in it's own way.

[whispering]

Fetish versus Paraphilia

"Sometimes people use the word “fetish” to imply any kind of “atypical” sexual interest, or kink. For sex researchers.., “fetish” specifically refers to a strong sexual preoccupation with an object, material or body part....... Usually the focus of a fetish is something not traditionally considered sexual.

“Paraphilia,” according to Robert T. Francouer’s The Complete Dictionary of Sexology,means compulsively responding in a sexual way to an unusual or socially unacceptable stimulus.

....The most recent edition, the DSM-IV, only describes paraphilia as a psychiatric disorder if it causes distress to the individual or harm to others.

Fetishism, as defined above, is a subcategory of paraphilia, but only qualifies as a disorder if it causes distress or harm."

http://kinseyconfidential.org/sexual-fetish-blog-post/

.................................................. .................................................. ............

interesting.

A craving for cock is still not a fetish nor paraphilia because a cock is traditionally considered sexual.

Looking at a cock as a stimulus for attraction is socially acceptable in the mainstream hetero society if you are a woman..maybe a man as well in some societies? ..ie accept same sex attraction as "normal".

Craving cock is not a psychiatric disorder unless it upsets distresses you that you crave cock or harms others. You're ok if you crave cock whether you crave the rest of the man or not. Relax about it. You're not crazy ;)

I don't think that the medical/psychiatric profession has done a very good job of defining sexuality. In one way, they are saying that something that causes harm is a disorder, otherwise it's just sexy. Well, duh?? The medical/legal profession is concerned with controlling behavior that is harmful, not what's "normal", but they get crazy and biased when they start trying to impose their ideas of what's OK on others.

Homosexuality was recently considered an extremely harmful activity, and those who did it were put in prison. It was also considered a "choice", which puts it into the realm of good and evil. So doctors classed it as a disorder. However, we've learned two things: (1) there is some hard-wiring of gay sexuality, that takes it out of the realm of choice and (2) it's perfectly possible to be homosexual and create lots of good, rather than harm. So that takes homosexuality out of the realm of morality, of good and evil, and we've discovered that the more acceptance gays experience in their social lives, the happier they are and those around them, too.

Currently, pedophilia is viewed the same way as homosexuality, and recently there is very clear evidence that pedophiles are not wired the way others are. Most humans are not sexually attracted, to any large extent, to children; pedophiles are, and there's not much they can do about it. However, because admitting to pedophilia is a guaranteed prison sentence (and a guaranteed short life once they enter prison), men with sexual attraction, most of whom have no desire to harm children because of their desire, are unable to seek any kind of help, professional or not, to modify their behavior. Pedophiles are different from child molesters, who are basically screwed up and operating from damaged psyches, rather than attraction. Pedophiles usually recognize their urges as harmful, or at least unacceptable, and would want to modify their behavior, and because of extreme stigmatization, are virtually excluded from obtaining help. If somebody has a DUI, we'll try to send them to AA to change their behavior before they kill someone, and in many cases that will work, and lives are saved. If they could not find help, they would drink and eventually are likely to kill themselves and/or others.

How did I get onto that??? Oh, yeah...it's behavior, not normalcy, that defines a disorder. Among the bisexuals on this forum we're seeing two pretty distinct attractions--some are attracted to men and fall in love with them. They want relationships that are emotional, caring and deep. They could, and do, fall in love with a guy. Others like cock, are turned on by cock, and aren't interested in relationships. There is probably a middle group of us who have so long covered up a broader attraction to men, and are slowly discovering that it might be fun to share a shower with a guy, too. This middle group may or may not "fall for" a guy (or girl if you're a girl). Nevertheless, there is a large group of men who are turned on by cocks and are not otherwise attracted to men. What's that about?

Well, as it happens, the largest and most popular genre of pornography is transsexual porn. Heterosexual men LOVE trannys!!! Why, because men are wired to be turned on by other cocks, as well as by tits and ass. Trannys have it all in one, irresistible package. (Not only that, it's ok to look if she also has tits). Some of us are simply acting on that normal attraction for cock, as well as what I would call simple sympathetic response. We know how good it must feel for the guy whose cock we're sucking! It's about the cock, and that's "normal", though our behavior sucking cock falls outside of most social norms. As we become more comfortable with our behavior, that naturally extends to other kinds of friendly activity, like showers. I would call that "friendly behavior"--similar to pouring your buddy a beer after a long day's work, and not the same as same-sex attraction. It's an expression of an open heart.

Well, that's my take on it. As for me, I love to suck cock, have always been attracted to cocks since before puberty, and have never "fallen for" a guy. But I do recognize that the more I am "intimate" with other men, the broader is my attraction and my behavior is changing.

The idea that hetero men are turned on by cock might be a bit controversial, and so I offer this academic and really interesting lecture on the neuroscience of porn. One of the other interesting things, which I've observed in many older bisexuals, is that bisexual men who have a serious relationship with another man do not often go back to another relationship with women. The same is not true for women, for whom attraction is much more contextual--emotional, related to security, and according to their situation in life, which naturally changes.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-A8GvUehq4&feature=player_embedded

[straponwilly]

Totally agree with you. I love women but don't find men at all attractive, but I need cock in my mouth and ass. All I can say is try Transgender! It's the most amazing thing ever!

[steve10557]

Yes full package for me too, from glance and kiss to suck and fuck. Not into love with a guy, just enjoying each other as completely as possible.

[Bi_Dave]

I'm with you. It's the cock and the cum. I couldn't tell you the color of his eyes. Lately, I've been thinking about getting a haircut and having the barber rub his hard cock against me looking for a reaction.

[curcpl88]

Hello, I think I know how you feel. I love the sight, and feel of another man's cock as well, but have no interest in hugging, caressing, kissing, etc - all the other things that we associate with a "normal" relationship. I do find, however, that a partner's personality matters quite a bit. If he plays into my turn-ons and I play into his, it makes for a much more satisfying encounter. I enjoy for example, for my partner to be a dominant top, directing me to service his cock,while urging me on verbally -it really adds to my enjoyment a his sub.

[tssoepxxx]

I love this post. I think I read over and over exactly the way I feel/am. I'm definitely attracted to cock, pussy, and any type of cum; I love it. Even though I'm not attracted to men or get turned on by a guy at the gym, for me to be with another man, he's got to have a decent body, be clean and smooth. So for me it's not just the waist down, but the body. Of course personality goes along way. But I can't plant a kiss on another dude. I have a girlfriend for the making out and cuddling aspect. I've only connected and had experiences with two other guys, one of them was cool and the other kept asking me to go out or take weekend trips and that turned me off; I just want the play. I often wondered if I was bi/bi-curious or if I just had a fetish. I though I was just hyper-sexual, I love all aspects of sex: taste, smell, feel woman or man, and if I can get my girl to allow another man, then I would be in heaven. I love the fact that she is into anal play with me. Anyways, great post.

[joavi]

I have seen so little men that I actually like, and so I have seen very little cock that I liked (in the last 3 years).

[PeninAZ]

Kinda sorta for me. I have to squint really hard (mentally) so as to imagine myself getting serious with a guy, but I totally have a cock fetish. One thing, however, though I can't take seriously the thought of "being in a relationship" with a man, there are some I find very appealing from time to time. Just got here myself by the way.

[eddieboy34]

I feel same the thought of a nice cock getting me going but I am not attracted to men at all just the cock